I’ll probably get into trouble with the feminists for this one. I can just imagine Germaine Greer riding an Uzi (no not *that* kind) and hunting me down.
‘How dare she think this.. AND the cow wears make-up.’
Let’s not be naïve here. I’m not talking about randoms. I’m talking a man that you are in a relationship with. A man you have chosen to share a bed with, be naked in front of, and maybe occassionally the odd fart in front of (if you really are that close.)
Let’s put this another way. How annoyed would you be if your bloke kept saying no when you asked him to put the bin out? First you would be incredulous, then annoyed, then frustrated and finally you would end up doing it yourself begrudgingly.
Now swing it round. Every time you say no to you partner, that’s effectively what is happening. And worse than the bin going off, is your relationship expiring.
The real bones of it (excuse the pun) if you will, boils down to the fact that number 1. He desires you, he wants you. Hooray! This is a lovely feeling. There is nothing else in the world like being wanted, desired.
Number 2. If you are not in the mood, you’ll soon get in the mood because he knows what you like.
Number 3. Sorry to say this but if you won’t give it to him, someone else will. Fact. That’s a little cynical, he’d have to be pretty unhappy to do that, but let’s face it, not having sex makes men pretty unhappy!
You should also never use sex as a weapon *of mass destruction* either:
Example: ‘If you don’t clean out the garage I won’t be giving you sex. Ever. You can touch it yourself until the end of time’
I actually find this gross. I don’t want to sound mushy but sex should be an expression of love, not a bargaining tool. If you are giving someone sex as a transaction, you might as well have a pin pad tattooed to your stomach, if it’s going to be that clinical.
If ultimately you don’t want sex with you partner any more because you are not attracted to him anymore/don’t want to be with him anymore – then please don’t stay with him. Not fair on him and not fair on you.
Point in case: One of my friends (she shall remain anonymous) dates guys for the presents they give her, and not because she is remotely interested in them as a person or sexually.
‘I don’t really enjoy sex with him but the jewellery is great!’
Eww!! Why don’t we all saddle up on the rich crusties out there?! I guess it has helped people like Mick Hucknall get laid but WHY would you be with a man you DIDN’T want to be intimate with? This I can’t fathom. But that’s just me.
Am I old fashioned? Unique? I’m not against feminism, I’m really not. These are my just my views spilling onto the page.
If you think your man is a sexy piece of ass then go on girls – give it to him.
Plus, sex burns lots of calories, that reason alone should be motivation…..